I don't have a Master's or Bachelor's, just a certificate
Sayin' "Certified Rapper", fresh, fly, and dapper
Cracker with cheese, and Connecticut steez,
B*tch I'm cooler than a summertime breeze, hoe please
In my jeans two cojones you better respect,
You couldn't get me with a net I'm the deadliest catch
The record labels ever seen, lettin' off steam,
Sippin' lean, American jumpin' bean
I'm a fiend for the opposite sex,
When I put your feet up by your neck, baby make us both sweat
Yes, I'm a damn dog like a Labrador,
Everyday I'm baggin' whores, f*ck you think I'm rappin' for?
And so what I be comin' out of Connecticut?
I'm sick of rappers gettin' big with no prerequisites
I be certified check the rap sheet,
While other kids were math geeks and athletes, I was a rap freak
'Cause you know that I'm about to get it poppin'
No start button for you, there's no option
Sippin' a concoction, I'm no boy from Boston,
The tristates ridin' with me, and stay rockin'
Never spit a flow that you won't feel,
Givin' you the news, f*ckin' April O'Neill
Got a Casey Jones flow, baby you can never doubt me,
Ten foot d*ck, balls bigger than Lebowski
[Chorus]
B*tch I'm certified whatchu think about that?
Cause' half these cats nowadays can't even rap
Baby I be certified, this is just a fact,
Freestyle, written, whatever it's all crack.
Baby I be certified, goin' to the top,
Cause' I can actually spit this ain't no pop
Baby I be certified, make the crowd rock
And do it all out of my love for this hip hop
Baby I be certified
Be certified, yes I be certified
So if you comin' with the beef, then I'll be servin' fries
Murder guys with the style I run,
From here to kingdom come and then some son (what?)
Professor Plum with the candle stick,
Killin' beats yo I'm on my Charles Manson sh*t
Hardcore, yo they softer than the Hanson clique,
Get buns everyday another random chick
Got my own lingo, never understanding others,
Roll deep with a muthaf*ckin' band of brothers
So flawless you'll be thinkin' "Uh, can he stutter?",
Nah not this slick-tongued panty-stuffer
You'd think Einstein lived in my house,
Get brains all day cause that's what wisdom's about
Summer Sanders sucked my d*ck until I Figured It Out,
And then I sent her back to Nick with my kids in her mouth
'Cause you know I get it done d-d-done-d-done over any beat,
Just give me any one w-w-one-w-one
With styles vicious got you wanna f*ckin' run-r-run,
Cause there's a lot of money, all I want is suh-s-suh-s-suh-s-suh-s-some
And I'm back-b-back givin' hip hop somethin' that it lack-l-lacks,
A little creativity up on the tra-tr-track
Webby's certified no debatin' that-th-that-th-that-th-that
[Chorus]
B*tch I'm certified whatchu think about that?
Cause' half these cats nowadays can't even rap
Baby I be certified, this is just a fact,
Freestyle, written, whatever it's all crack.
Baby I be certified, goin' to the top,
Cause' I can actually spit this ain't no pop
Baby I be certified, make the crowd rock
And do it all out of my love for this hip hop
Baby I be certified
Baby I be certified, certified, certified